It
seems like a day doesn’t go by that there’s another article or news report
about how unhealthy your children are. Yet while it’s true that obesity and
diabetes are increasing at a staggering rate in the U.S., that doesn’t mean
that all kids are unhealthy and that you need to have a knee-jerk reaction to your
children based on a superficial idea of what being healthy looks like.
Children who are lean tend to be viewed as healthy, whereas
kids who are not are often perceived as being unhealthy. This isn’t necessarily
so - body shape isn’t an indication of health at all.
It’s important for parents and kids to realize the health doesn’t
have one look. Healthy bodies come in all shapes and sizes.
Some kids are “all knees and elbows” and are naturally
thin. Others are stocky and sturdy. Looking at your children’s physical appearances can help you
to assess a certain level of health. When you’re an objective observer, you can
notice changes that may be indications that you should be concerned. After all,
you likely see your children every day. Really seeing your kids so you can be alert to significant changes is key,
but it’s not all you should be taking into consideration.
You should also look beyond physical appearance to
determine if your child is really healthy or actually at risk.
Parents often encourage children who are thin to eat more,
but if your children are naturally thin, this may not be necessary and could only
cause undue mealtime drama. Most healthy children will eat enough to fuel their
bodies at the level that makes them comfortable.
If your children seem to suddenly lose their appetite or if
they never eat any fruit or vegetables, then you might have a legitimate concern.
However, consider that this may be your son or daughter’s natural weight and it’s
nothing to worry about -- as they age, their bodies may change and fill out.
On the other hand, parents of kids who are on the stockier
side often attempt to restrict calories. However, the majority of kids don’t need
to be placed on diets. If you struggled with your weight as a child or if you’re
very weight conscious now, be aware that you may be projecting your own body
image onto your children.
Forcing children to lose weight or focus too much on being
thinner at a young age can set them up for years of struggling with their own
body image issues. Again, be willing to consider that this may be a healthy
weight for your son or daughter. Their stocky build may disappear when they go
through a growth spurt or it may be that they’re simply going to retain this
physical attribute and weigh more than their contemporaries.
How can you know if you should be concerned in the first
place? First, look beyond a number on a scale. Health is more than just weight.
Are your children physically active? Do they breathe hard or have difficulty
moving? These are signs that are more important than weight in the end.
Of course, you may consult with your pediatrician to be
sure that they don’t have any health concerns. Having a professional opinion
can help balance out any personal biases you may have, whether they’re about
weight, food, or physical activity.
Another way to help you know that you’re accurately seeing
your children and assessing their health is to tap into your Internal Guidance
System (IGS). As much as you love your children and want what’s best for them,
it can be difficult for you to look at them objectively. Due to your own issues,
you may be overly concerned with your kids’ weight. You may overlook a weight
problem because they look like you did as a kid or because we love them “just
the way they are.” Loving your kids no matter what is great, but you do them a
disservice when you ignore warning signs that their health is in danger.
This is why your IGS can be such a powerful tool. When you
tap into your inner wisdom, you cut away your biases and feel the truth of the
matter. You can evaluate whether your children are eating too little or too
much. Your IGS will help us recognize when your kids are in need of
encouragement to make healthier eating choices or to be more active. It will
also help you to know the best way to give that encouragement.
The bottom line is you want your kids to be healthy. You
can help them and encourage them, but you need to remember that healthy kids
come in all shapes in sizes. Look at the variety of body shapes in the Olympics
and other sporting events. Some people naturally bulk up while others can be
strong and look quite thin. Different body types often lead to different
athletic abilities -- think of a sprinter versus an endurance runner. Both are
healthy and yet their bodies look quite different. It’s up to your kids to
decide which they are.
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